Politics and Step-by-Step Instructions for men
[Fully Detailed Version]
These instructions are offered because most men do not know how to properly clean a bathroom well – due to male privilege. And Women should not have to teach men how to clean bathrooms – men should do that.
Cleaning as service is a classic FemDom fantasy among men. And it is a fantasy fueled in good part by deeply ingrained misogyny. There is little point in denying the sexism inherent in the fantasy. However, acknowledging and exploring the contradiction may open the door to a larger discussion about how cleaning and other tasks part of the male FemDom fantasy might serve a useful role in supporting Women.
Below are detailed, step-by-step instructions for cleaning Her bathroom. Every cleaning job will be different, of course, and one of the first steps is to assess the particular job to which She has assigned you so that you can adjust your work as necessary.
i never learned how to properly clean a bathroom until i was lucky enough to meet several Women over the years who were extremely generous and gave me the opportunity to serve them in a FemDom context. Driven at first by my sexual fetish, then later by personal gratitude, and then finally by my growing awareness of the politics involved, i worked hard in cleaning for these Women. As a result of the opportunity these Women gave me, i learned how to clean a bathroom properly and efficiently. This task is something that i should have learned when growing up, but i avoided due to male privilege. So, these instructions really come to you by the grace and generosity of the Women who allowed me to serve and learn.
The cleaning fetish is powered, at least in part, by the allure of humiliation and domination via role-reversal in which the submissive male takes on “woman’s work” as part of his submission. Rare are the fantasies of fixing Her car, barbecuing Her dinner, or remodeling Her house as submissive service. The cleaning fetish is directly rooted in the understanding of cleaning as woman’s work, as work that a traditional “man” would not conduct unless forced. In this light, it is clear that cleaning fantasies actually perpetuate negative gender stereotypes about Women.
The cleaning fetish is but one expression of the overall sexism inherent in the larger the FemDom fantasy, a fantasy informed by the patriarchal concept of gender hierarchy and applied here through the reversal of the traditional hierarchy to secure a dominated state for the submissive male. Gender hierarchy of any form, including female supremacy, is not an expression of feminism. The practice of Female supremacy is a gift from Women who are willing to bestow it to men who desire it. Being given the opportunity to clean for Her in a FemDom setting is a gift.
Bathrooms often present a dirty and distasteful task that few, if any, like to do. Cleaning a bathroom doesn’t require special skill nor does the task help develop an important talent not already possessed by fully mature adults. In this light, cleaning a dirty bathroom can be recognized as not the optimal use of Her time, and as a very good use of your time if you truly desire to serve Her.
In this context it is possible that cleaning could be a useful and legitimate service for Her, but only if it is practiced with awareness of the larger political context; only if it is conducted with immense appreciation and gratitude for the gift She is giving you, and only if your service is carried out efficiently and with significant effort and in such a way that a minimum amount of Her time and effort is required for supervision.
All of the above is a very superficial analysis, of course. And it is not a new contribution. However, i wanted to introduce the instructions below in proper context.
One final word: as an upper-middle class, white male, born and raised in the United State, my vision on this subject is very narrow, at best, and perhaps at worst considerably biased. i hope that i receive comments that will allow me to revise and improve this post. That said, this Tumblr is a place to offer what i can, and i humbly hope this post is helpful to other sexually submissive males so they become better in serving Woman.
Instructions
1) Listen carefully when She gives you directions.
- You may need to write things down in order to remember everything. If so, ask Her if you may do that. Be sure to have paper and pencil ready.
- If allowed, now is the time to ask any questions you might have. For example, does She want you to avoid or use any cleaning products in particular? Does She want the bath towels laundered and new towels set out? Or should you simply re-hang the current towels? Thank Her for any direction She gives you.
Keep your questions to a MINIMUM. Serving Her means resolving as many questions as you can on your own, so that you take up as little of Her valuable time as possible. When in doubt, you may want to complete the whole job first, leaving a few small tasks till the end when you will ask Her to inspect your work. At that time you would let Her know you are almost done, request Her to inspect your work so far, and let Her know you have a couple of final tasks about which you would like to ask Her for Her direction. See much more below for various questions you need to consider in cleaning Her bathroom.
2) Assess the bathroom
- Confirm that your cleaning routine will work, and if not figure out the adjustments. In particular determine how much scrubbing will be required. Some bathrooms need heavy and extensive scrubbing which usually requires getting things very wet, which makes the job more complicated and demands more forethought and preparation. At other times the floor may only need a combination of spot scrubbing and light sponging. If the walls and ceiling haven’t been cleaned in a long time, they may have a light greasy film, and will need heavy sponge cleaning. At other times they may just need a few cobwebs to be swept away. Pay particular attention to the walls in the bathtub/shower and around the vanity.
- Identify what, if any, cleaning supplies you will need that you don’t already have on hand and get them. (See the list of cleaning supplies at the bottom that you should have on hand.)
Note: Do NOT go to Her with any questions that you can figure out your own. Serving Her means solving problems on your own, not bringing problems to Her for Her to solve. If you need something you don’t have, get it or find it. Only go to Her if you really believe you need something and you need Her permission to get it, or if you really believe it is inappropriate to move forward on what you think is the best course of action without Her direction. If there is a secondary way to get things done that doesn’t require Her attention, consider doing that instead, even if it takes more time and effort.
It’s important to think through Her directions at this time. Perhaps She told you to ask all questions as soon as possible because She’s about to start on something and doesn’t want to be bothered. Or perhaps She wants you to carry out Her instructions with as little management from Her as possible. Or perhaps She doesn’t want you to do anything/look for anything without Her express permission. It’s YOUR duty as a submissive to figure this out. You should pay extremely close attention to what She says, how She manages you, and what kind of general expectations She puts out for you. You can learn from all that so you don’t have to be asking Her a bunch of questions that take up Her time and attention.
Finally and very importantly, carefully consider how much time She wants devoted to the job and what level of detailing She expects. You need to be efficient in your service to Her.
3) Clear out the bathroom
- Pick up any dirty clothes and deal with them appropriately
For example, pile them neatly just outside the bathroom door; go put them in a dirty clothes basket; or possibly put them in washing machine and start it, if you’re sure She wants them washed and you know how to wash Her clothes.
- Pull out bathmat, rugs, towels etc.
- Beat rugs/mats outside and hang them outside if possible. [Note: you may wait on this step if you suspect the floor will take a bit to dry after you are done cleaning it, at the end. You can beat rugs/mats while you are waiting for the floor to dry.]
Note: do NOT abuse this option for sake of public display. Remember it is HER privacy you should be focused on, not yours. Another possibility is getting out a vacuum and going over the rugs and mat. If neither of those options is available, consider hand brushing the rugs/mat and or hand-picking them.
- Fold and put towels to the side or put them in the washing if that’s what She wants.
- Bring odd items out of the bathroom so you can (later) clean the floor, e.g. trashcan, bathroom scale, toilet scrub brush, magazine holder, etc.
4) Clear off counters
Carefully put away everything that should be in a drawer or cabinet. Throw away any trash.
[You may need to clean the inside of cabinets and organize their contents. But She may not want you inside there. You may not know how she wants things organized. And She may not want you to spend that much time.]
At this point you may need to dry sponge the counters if they are wet and dirty. Later you will do a full clean of counters later. Now you are just prepping.
5) Brush out the room
With a handbrush (and dustpan) brush off the walls, counters, toilet, and possibly the shower/tub enclosure if it is dry.
You want to sweep up all the dirt and dust you can so that you don’t end up having to sponge/scrub/mop-up loose dirt and dust.
6) Empty out the tub/shower
Pull out shampoo bottles, soap dishes, trays etc., and place carefully outside tub.
7) Scrub the tub/shower floor
Wet down the bottom of the tub/shower and sprinkle out scouring powder (e.g. Bon Ami). Spread the powder with a damp sponge so the coverage is even. If the tub is very dirty you might let it sit for a few minutes while you go on to the next task and then come back. However, don’t let things dry out. Scrub the tub bottom and sides using a scrubbie sponge. Rinse well, several times. Even a tiny bit of scouring powder left behind will be felt by whoever uses the tub next.
8) Scrub shower wall, fixtures and inside of glass door(s).
Doing a good job at this point generally means stepping all the way into the tub/shower. Do this in your bare feet and make sure your feet are clean. Leave a bath mat on the floor outside the shower so you don’t get the floor wet when you step back out.
Cleaning while naked or nearly naked at this point can be helpful (if She desires/permits), as it is hard otherwise not to get a little wet.
- Scrub/wash the walls of the shower/tub with a soft tile-safe scouring powder and/or cleaning spray. Rinse well as needed.
Be extra careful cleaning non-tiled surfaces in showers/tubs such as painted walls that may run above a lower tiled-section of the wall. Painted walls should be cleaned with a soft sponge and water only or, if very dirty, a very mild cleaning spray, picking or possibly spot scrubbing with a scrubbie when necessary [see more below on cleaning walls].
- Scrub the facets/handles/shower heads etc. The best method is two-step. Scrub as needed with a soft scouring powder on sponge. Then go back over with windex/spray ammonia to get the fixtures to gleam.
- Scrub the INSIDE of the glass shower doors. Water deposits and residue soap scum show up easily very easily on glass. Concerted scrubbing with a soft glass-safe scouring powder will probably be needed. Clean the any trim as well as corners and inside edges where surfaces meet and grime can build up. Rinse well. Finally rub dry with a microfiber cloth and/or go over with windex and paper towels to eliminate the streak marks and finish off.
- Rinse off your feet and step out of the tub, stepping onto the bath mat you left outside the tub so you don’t get the floor wet. Dry your feet.
- Do a final rinse of the shower/tub as needed from outside the shower/tub, and spot clean with windex/paper towel to finish off and get rid of any streaks marks.
9) Clean OUTSIDE shower doors/tub sidewalls
- Use a scrubbie sponge and water or possibly a mild cleaning spray. Rinse your sponge out as necessary in the bathroom sink. Be careful not to use too much water as to keep it from running onto the floor and making a wet mess. Clean any trim as well as corners and inside edges where surfaces meet and grime can build up. Do a final pass with windex and paper towels to finish off and get the glass doors to gleam.
[It’s very possible that a quick clean with windex is all you need to do altogether.]
Do NOT use scouring powder here or a lot of soap as you will not be able to rinse off properly without running a lot of water onto the bathroom floor.
10) Clean and put back all the shower-items
Clean and dry the soap dishes, shampoo bottles, trays/racks etc that you pulled out of the shower/tub before you started and now put back those items back, organizing neatly. You may need to discard used disposable razers, empty bottles etc.
11) Clean walls and ceiling
Sometimes this part of the job can take a LOT of time – like hours. So, judge carefully how much time She wants you to devote to cleaning Her bathroom. To do the ceiling and upper walls you will need a step-ladder. Often you can clean quickly and simply by damp sponging just the side walls with a soft-sponge. You can lightly pick or spot-scrub tough spots with a scrubbie, but be careful as you can easily scrub the paint off, too.
Water is a mild solvent and hot water can do often do the job along. But if you need the aid of soap, mix three or four drops of dish detergent in half-filled bucket of water. Or you can use two or three tablespoons of distilled white vinegar.
If the upper walls and ceiling have not been cleaned in while they may have accumulated a semi-transparent layer of greasy dirt, particularly if the bathroom is near a kitchen where steam from cooking wafts upward. Use a mixture of 1 cup of ammonia, ½ cup vinegar and ¼ cup baking soda with 1 gallon of warm water. Rinse the cleaning solution off the walls with a clean sponge saturated with clear water. Wipe down the rinsed walls with a soft, dry rag.
A word about TSP – trisodium phosphate: TSP is a product of last resort and can cause a lot of damage. TSP is usually used only when the walls will be re-painted. It is a powerful degreaser and etches the paints so the next coat of paint will adhere strongly. However, it can damage other surfaces, staining metals such as shower doors, chromed drains and plumbing fixtures, and can also etch the glazing on ceramic tile. And it is extremely abusive of skin. So you will need rubber gloves, long-sleeves and safety goggles. Rubber gloves often tear, and even a little TSP can cause severely irritate the skin and raise a rash. So, you should have a couple of pair of gloves.
12) Clean counters, cabinets, and windows
Now is the time to clean the counters and windows as well as the outside of wall cabinets and floor cabinets. Also clean towels racks and similar fixtures.
Use sponge/scrubbie and hot water or mild soap. If you use a lot of soap rinse with a sponge. Use windex/paper towels to finish mirrors, windows, and fixtures. Clean any counter items like soap dishes, lotion dispensers, mirrors on stands etc.
13) Clean the toilet
Use sponge/scrubbie and mild soap to clean the entire outside surfaces of the toilet. You may wish to use disinfectant. Clean the underside of the toilet all the way down to the floor. Be sure to clean the backside of the toilet as much as possible.
Clean the toilet bowl rim, seat and cover. You may have to lift the seat up and down to clean well around the hinges where the seat/cover connect to the rim.
You may have to wipe down the toilet surfaces numerous times to chase down and pickup stray hairs etc.
Clean inside the toilet bowl. You may use disinfectant and scouring powder. A toilet brush may do the job but hand scrubbing with a scrubbie sponge will probably do a better job. You may leave some soap in the bowl to sit and clean as a final step.
14) Clean the floor
Earlier you brushed cleaned the floor. Now you need to clean the floor with hot water and possibly soap.
Cleaning the floor can take a lot of time. So choose a method that fits the time She has allotted to you.
Cleaning the floor is done most efficiently from on your hands and knees, using a sponge, scrubbie, or scrub brush depending. Put on knee pads so you don’t hurt your knees. Working on your bare knees may seem submissive, but you are only creating another concern for Her to deal with.
At a minimum should damp sponge and spot scrub. Hot water is an excellent solvent/cleaner.
If you use soap, sure to go back over the floor at least once and maybe twice couple to rinse up the soap. This may best be done with a large sponge and bucket or a mop and bucket. For a wood floor use appropriate soap (e.g. Murphy’s soap).
[Clean the baseboards, too, at the points if you didn’t clean them when you cleaned the walls.]
Sometimes you might need a bucket of hot water (with soap as appropriate). Sometimes it may be quicker to use the bathroom sink instead. Sometimes use both: use the bucket for wetting and soaping your sponge/scrubbie/brush and use the sink for rinsing it out. If the bathroom floor is very large consider the two-bucket method that employs a bucket with two tubs, one for wetting/soaping, one for rinsing.
Here is the sequence for scrubbing or mopping the floor:
a) Wet/soap your scrubbie/sponge. Then squeeze most of the water out.
b) Sponge/scrub a small section of the floor. Spot scrub hard where needed.
c) Squeeze the dirty sponge over a sink or bucket, squeezing out the dirty water. Wet the sponge and squeeze out again to get out all the dirt.
d) Go back over that section until it is clean.
e) Repeat until the floor is clean.
Work from one corner of the room back towards the door so you don’t get trapped in a corner. You probably will need access to the sink as well. Plan accordingly.
After cleaning you may need to “wax/shine” the floor. Follow the directions for whatever products you are using.
15) Return all items to the bathroom
Put back all the mats and rugs. Re-hang towels or put up fresh ones. Put back items like wastebaskets (note if emptying the wastebasket requires going outside into public view make sure She is OK with that. Otherwise wait for Her direction. Remember it is HER privacy you should be focused on, not yours.)
Wipe down and clean all items before putting them back.
16) Final spot clean
Survey the bathroom and spot clean anything you missed or that got dirty after you cleaned it. In particular the bathroom sink may need attention.
17) Clean up your supplies
Gather your cleaning supplies and bag things like used paper towels. Basically get ready to leave in case She is done with your service after this.
18) Ask for Her inspection
Do not presume that you are done with the work until She says that you are. If you have final tasks that need Her direction, let Her know at this time. If She is busy and it does not look appropriate to interrupt Her, it might be best to simply wait a bit. Look for another find a task that you do while you wait – for example go wash some dishes. You can also look for graceful way to get Her attention or slip Her a note.
19) THANK HER when She says you are done.
Thank Her for Her supervision and for inspecting your work.
Most importantly, Thank Her for giving you an opportunity to serve. You are very lucky.
Cleaning Supplies
- handbrush
- dustpan
- trashbag
- scrubbie sponges
- mild spray cleaner/disinfectant
- soft scouring powder
- scrub brush
- toothbrush
- windex
- paper towels
- rubber gloves (two pair)
- bucket
- rags
- paper/pencil
- knee pads
more options
- mop
- ammonia, vinegar and cup baking soda
(for mixing heavy duty degreasing/cleaning mix)
- murphy’s oil soap (for wood floors)
- floor wax/shine
- small microfiber drying towel
