Greetings Mistresses, fellow slaves, submissive's and FemDom enthusiasts. My name is Adishesha & I have long lived as the god of my own universe, captain of the ship of me, and as such have never sought out anyone to take over those duties and responsibilities. I am a male who is has two very strong but opposing sides. One side is very active, aggressive, creative, capable of leadership and proud of being a man.The other side of me is not quite as strong but is also powerful. That is the side that not only worships women, but loves being humiliated and being a submissive slave. Yes, I consider myself as a submissive-slave but I am no way a doormat which can be walked all over and abused. I am in fact a very intelligent and independent person. Yet, since the age of 8 or so, I've had sexually charged fantasies about being overwhelmed by bossy, arrogant, dominant women. I kept that side of myself hid for so many years. I know, if I keep ignoring my submissive desires and suppress them, they will not go away and these desires will become stronger with age. I know oneday the desire to submit to a women which is present within me will eventually win out & I believe oneday that the right Dominant Mistress will come into my life with ease at the right time. Until then, I will keep on educating myself by actively surfing on the internet, reading blogs, books, and magazines related to BDSM.
Adishesha Fetlife Profile
Age: 24
Height: 5'9"
Eye Color: Brown
Hair color: Black
Shoe/boots: 10
Sign: Leo
We cannot judge a person solely on the basis of a title they may have chosen, or, more importantly, the title on the basis of the people who may choose to use it. These titles are indicators at best and not necessarily of a person’s character. There is no black and white, or grey, here, there are endless shades of every colour of the rainbow.
Do not judge the book by its title, but most of all, don’t believe the hype.
So if you came to the lifestyle because 50 Shades of Grey made it more accessible, good for you. We are all on our own journey and we can reach the same destination from many different paths.
But please don’t think that you have to do something you don’t want to because you are submissive or Dominant.
Please don’t think that once you have given your consent that you have given up the right to withdraw it.
Please don’t think that as a submissive you don’t have the right to say no, or to express your concerns or talk about what you like, want or need from your partner to be happy.
Please don’t think that you have to be anything other than your full authentic self to fit into the lifestyle.
BDSM isn’t about shades of grey. It’s about a full color spectrum of people and activities and choices that make our world beautiful.
Don't become an indispensable doormat in order to 'keep' a relationship
Do doormat submissives - those who do anything and everything their Dominant requires without a single thought to their own well-being, likes, dislikes, etc. and who forgive a Dominant who neglects consent - exist?
Of course they do. I worry for them. Their issues are bigger than a run-in with a bad Dominant (as dangerous to their health and well-being as that can be).
Do tyrant, asshole Dominants - the ones who ignore consent and safewords, thinking of no one but themselves and their own pleasure - exist?
Yes, and those of us in the BDSM lifestyle don't consider them "Dominants" but simply abusers who probably belong in jail. They are what we fight against every time we talk about BDSM with someone new.
If You Don't Respect Yourself, Why Should Anyone Else?
Respect yourself as you’re a unique human being with strengths and great qualities of your own, you need to respect your entire mind, body, and spirit.
We are human beings, first and foremost. We are our individual person second, and last, we are Top/bottom.
It’s important to realize this early on. It’s important because then we retain the ability of perspective. It’s important to know, that the first two come first for a reason.
That Dominant is not a fetish factory, they are a person, with feelings. The effort, time, discipline, skill, and emotion that comes with receiving authority usually comes at a great personal cost. It isn’t something I, as a Top mind so much when that effort is given back. It isn’t even something I consider until that effort isn’t given back.
That submissive is not a toy to use and take from without filling with their own needs. They are a person, with feelings and emotions, and giving themselves to someone else’s authority requires a great deal of personal sacrifice as well, with the hopes that they have found someone who will fulfill their desires and needs without forgetting that with it comes an attachment that it unparalleled.
No matter how our dynamics unfold, what we consider ourselves, how we define and label our submission or Dominance, we are human beings first. If someone can not respect the human, and the person, then that person does not deserve the Top or bottom. They do not deserve the time or the effort, the patience or the care that goes into being good at either side of the slash. They will not respect it if they can not respect you as a whole being, an individual person.
We are not an ends to a means.
We are not something to be used and discarded.
We are people, who will be appreciated and cared for by the right company, but we will be taken advantage of, and taken for granted by those who can not look past themselves.
Know what you deserve, and expect nothing less of those whom you allow into your lives. Allow nothing less. Know your value, know your worth, and don’t ever let anyone tell you differently.
Adishesha Fetlife Profile
Age: 24
Height: 5'9"
Eye Color: Brown
Hair color: Black
Shoe/boots: 10
Sign: Leo
We cannot judge a person solely on the basis of a title they may have chosen, or, more importantly, the title on the basis of the people who may choose to use it. These titles are indicators at best and not necessarily of a person’s character. There is no black and white, or grey, here, there are endless shades of every colour of the rainbow.
Do not judge the book by its title, but most of all, don’t believe the hype.
So if you came to the lifestyle because 50 Shades of Grey made it more accessible, good for you. We are all on our own journey and we can reach the same destination from many different paths.
But please don’t think that you have to do something you don’t want to because you are submissive or Dominant.
Please don’t think that once you have given your consent that you have given up the right to withdraw it.
Please don’t think that as a submissive you don’t have the right to say no, or to express your concerns or talk about what you like, want or need from your partner to be happy.
Please don’t think that you have to be anything other than your full authentic self to fit into the lifestyle.
BDSM isn’t about shades of grey. It’s about a full color spectrum of people and activities and choices that make our world beautiful.
Don't become an indispensable doormat in order to 'keep' a relationship
Abusers definitely exist within kink communities, just as
they exist in the world.
Do doormat submissives - those who do anything and everything their Dominant requires without a single thought to their own well-being, likes, dislikes, etc. and who forgive a Dominant who neglects consent - exist?
Of course they do. I worry for them. Their issues are bigger than a run-in with a bad Dominant (as dangerous to their health and well-being as that can be).
Do tyrant, asshole Dominants - the ones who ignore consent and safewords, thinking of no one but themselves and their own pleasure - exist?
Yes, and those of us in the BDSM lifestyle don't consider them "Dominants" but simply abusers who probably belong in jail. They are what we fight against every time we talk about BDSM with someone new.
If You Don't Respect Yourself, Why Should Anyone Else?
Respect yourself as you’re a unique human being with strengths and great qualities of your own, you need to respect your entire mind, body, and spirit.
We are human beings, first and foremost. We are our individual person second, and last, we are Top/bottom.
It’s important to realize this early on. It’s important because then we retain the ability of perspective. It’s important to know, that the first two come first for a reason.
That Dominant is not a fetish factory, they are a person, with feelings. The effort, time, discipline, skill, and emotion that comes with receiving authority usually comes at a great personal cost. It isn’t something I, as a Top mind so much when that effort is given back. It isn’t even something I consider until that effort isn’t given back.
That submissive is not a toy to use and take from without filling with their own needs. They are a person, with feelings and emotions, and giving themselves to someone else’s authority requires a great deal of personal sacrifice as well, with the hopes that they have found someone who will fulfill their desires and needs without forgetting that with it comes an attachment that it unparalleled.
No matter how our dynamics unfold, what we consider ourselves, how we define and label our submission or Dominance, we are human beings first. If someone can not respect the human, and the person, then that person does not deserve the Top or bottom. They do not deserve the time or the effort, the patience or the care that goes into being good at either side of the slash. They will not respect it if they can not respect you as a whole being, an individual person.
We are not an ends to a means.
We are not something to be used and discarded.
We are people, who will be appreciated and cared for by the right company, but we will be taken advantage of, and taken for granted by those who can not look past themselves.
Know what you deserve, and expect nothing less of those whom you allow into your lives. Allow nothing less. Know your value, know your worth, and don’t ever let anyone tell you differently.
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